In the car ride over he kept telling me, "You don't come in with me Mom. You just drop me off and then pick me up later, okay?" But once we arrived and he saw other parents walking in, he did take my hand and let me take him into class. Totally for my sake. We got to do a fun art project together and he just kept hugging me--the tightest hugs. I know those are special ones that are telling me, "I'm so excited Mom. Thank you. This is so fun!" But eventually he did look at me like, "Are you going to leave yet?" So I gave him one last squeeze and walked out. That's when I started crying. And it surprised me because wasn't I excited for him? Not sad? We talked about it for months how excited we BOTH were for him to start school. But here I was running my mascara.
It's an end of an era. He is big and older and ready for big things and older things. He wants this. He actually needs this stuff to challenge him. And what gets me, is that he is EXCITED for it all. I am no longer coaxing a baby to grow; it is his initiative. Miss Molly asked me if he was going to be alright with the adjustment, and I told her that he is more than fine. Now I think I'm the one that needs help with this adjustment. When I got home, I laid Lennon down for a nap, and just sat in my quiet house. It was the oddest feeling. It only lasted for an hour but knowing Myer was somewhere else starting something new without me, was just weird. I didn't think I'd be this sad weird mom having issues sending her child to preschool, but I totally am! (And it's only 2 hours twice a week! Get a grip!)
But he came home so excited, chatting my ear off, and yes the snacks were the big hit. He is not happy with the fact that we have to wait till next Tuesday to go back, however. Which is just fine with me! But I am glad that the big milestone of the First Day of School was positive and that he wants to go back. Makes this weird emotional roller coaster easier. Just a little.
