Tuesday, August 2, 2011

birth story

You've been warned.  This is a birth story.  I've decided to share this since I want to show Myer's birth video and this would explain my "sleepy" state.  Also, there have been some pretty funny rumors floating around so let's set the record straight.  Ready?

It all started on the Monday before my due date.  There was a lot of blood so we rushed to the hospital.  They started hooking me up to machines, monitoring baby's heartbeat, the regular stuff to figure out what was going on.  They checked my blood pressure, which I wasn't worried about since the whole pregnancy it was fine.  But this time it was sky high.  Kinda surprising.  The diagnosis was that the placenta was starting to tear away, in other words Placenta Abruption.  The on-call doctor expressed that this is serious and that I needed to be induced right away.  She explained the risks of Placenta Abruption and started throwing around words like low birth weight, brain damage, fetal death, etc. etc.  Imagining a pregnant woman hearing these things?  Yes not pretty.  Poor poor Jake trying to deal with me.

Another risk of Placenta Abruption is that I could seizure, stroke, or worse, during labor.  Joy.  More good news.  So to prevent those episodes from happening they put me on this medicine call Magnesium.  It makes you dizzy, nauseous, clammy, and swollen.  Exactly how you want to feel pushing a baby out right?  And they told me if I didn't push him out in time, I would have a c-section.  More pressure to preform while being dizzy and nauseous....So I was started on Pitocin, and the lovely Mag, around 8:00 pm.

After breaking my water 3 times (I had 3 layers of amniotic fluid...) the ball started rolling.  I was in labor for 16 hours and pushed for 3.  It took so long because I would sleep during each set of pushes.  Yes sleep.  But only little 2-3 second catnaps.  I couldn't keep my eyes open, and during those naps I would seriously have mini dreams.  I woke up one time and told Jake, "I want that jacket." and then was ready to push again.  Imagine Jake's surprise.  Finally Myer came at 11:59 AM.  Healthy.  Phew.  

I was so out of it by this time I don't remember who was in the room; who was here to see the birth of my son.  I only remember hearing Myer coo in someone's arms (Later I was told it was my Dad).  Oh, and I also remember throwing up.  In front of everyone.  Like 3 times.  

My nurse then started prepping me to transfer me to the Mother Baby Floor.  I remember she made a comment saying that I was lopsided on one side, but didn't do anything about. Little did I know that this would spell trouble for me.  How should I know?  She took out my epidural out and whisked me to the elevator.  I threw up in that moving elevator twice.   

Once in my room the new nurse told me that I would feel my uterus contracting to get back to normal.  I should have asked what "contraction" she was talking about: labor like contractions, which really feel like those lovely time-of-the-month-cramps, or true business contracting?  So in my sleepy slumber I would feel this hard core awful "contraction".  I would wake up screaming in pain and then whimper off to sleep again about ever 30 minutes.  Jake was the only one in the room with me and we both thought this was normal.  I was warned right?  

My mom came in to see how I was doing and noticed instantly something was wrong.  I was ghostly white and my lips blended in with my face.  I kept cringing in pain when I all wanted to do was sleep.  She got the nurse and basically demanded she see me right away.  Good thing for moms.  The nurse came in thinking that I was just a first-time nervous mom, but nope, she saw it too.  She started poking around on my tummy and noticed the I was lopsided on one side.  Sound familiar?  Apparently from my placenta tearing away I was bleeding internally.  (Hence the sleepiness. I was loosing blood.) Blood was pooling inside me creating massive blood clots which had to come out.  And those awful contractions were not because my uterus was coming back together, oh no, it was my body trying to get rid of the blood  Now understand, it's been a few hours, the epidural is wearing off, and I've had an episiotomy...I have to push out blood clots.

This is the pain that I vividly remember. This is when I stopped being a trooper.  I was a really good girl during those hours of labor.  I tried very hard not to yell, cry, or scream.  But it all ended here.  Every time they pushed down on my stomach to push out the clots, I screamed.  I wouldn't let go of Jake's hand.  In fact I was white-knuckling his poor little fingers.  Finally after basically laying in her whole body weight, the nurse pushed out a clot the size of Myer.  Everybody in the room gasped.  Jake wouldn't let me look at it.  (This blood clot became known around the hospital as the "un-loved baby".)  But there were more to get out.  I was such a baby, I kept repeating over and over to Jake, "make them stop, make them stop."  Again, poor poor Jake.  After a few more blood clots, my stomach felt normal.  No more pushing. No more pain. 

After a few hours, however, I still wasn't healing the way I should have been.  I had a few different doctors take a look at me and they decided to give me a quart of blood.  Long story short, I ended up getting 3 quarts of blood. You should have seen my arms: I looked like a heroin addict with all my IV's, Mag, Blood Transfusions, and spots where they tested my blood.... It was a long road to recovery for me, and I was happy to get home and rest.  And rest I did.  I have awesome family, friends, and neighbors that really went above and beyond for our little family.  (Thank you!)

This was definitely not the way I've seen babies born on tv, or stories that I've heard from friends.  In fact I came home from the hospital feeling guilty that I couldn't remember Myer's birth, or that I didn't have this grandiose spiritual experience.  I guess this is why I am so excited to have this video.  So bear with me!  I am also grateful for modern medicine, hospitals, doctors, nurses, etc. who saved my life.  (My OB later told me that this was how pioneer women died from labor.  Gotta love that awful Magnesium.)  And more importantly I am grateful that Myer came healthy and strong.  That's all that really matters right?  God does hear our prayers even if we are in and out of consciousness.